


A New Problem

by justdk



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Narcolepsy, POV Neil Josten, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:35:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27963872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justdk/pseuds/justdk
Summary: This might be a problem, Neil thought.He was awake but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t open his eyes but he could feel Andrew kneeling over him. Andrew was patting his cheek and saying his name over and over but Neil couldn’t respond. His heart started racing as he tried, again and again, to open his eyes or move his arm, to do anything.[or: Neil has narcolepsy]
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 26
Kudos: 287





	A New Problem

**Author's Note:**

> This was written to fill a tumblr prompt for either Andrew or Neil having narcolepsy. I did some research on the Mayo Clinic's website so that's were all my info is coming from. Hopefully I handled this well but if I got things wrong let me know! One of the symptoms of narcolepsy is sleep paralysis which is what Neil experiences with Andrew.

Neil didn’t realize anything was wrong at first. He was just sleepy most of the time, nodding off in class or while studying or hanging out with the team. It seemed like the logical thing to happen – he’d been running himself ragged for years and now that he was safe and his future was secure of course his body would seize the moment and catch up on all the rest he’d missed.

No one else thought it was a problem either. Matt had started affectionately calling him “Napping Neil.” There were lots of pictures of him taking impromptu naps around campus. His professors weren’t thrilled when he’d suddenly go down for a quick sleep but by then they knew what he’d been through and cut him some slack. At least he was showing up to class and doing his work. 

But after several weeks Neil was starting to get worried. He couldn’t predict when he’d fall asleep, though it tended to happen whenever he was sitting still for a prolonged period of time. And he had this deep-seated, lingering anxiety that he shouldn’t be letting his guard down and falling asleep in unsecured places like the classroom, library, or even – on one occasion – the dining hall.

Despite all the naps he never felt rested and he generally felt half-asleep throughout the day. At night he’d lie awake long after Andrew had fallen asleep, sometimes getting up to go watch Exy on his laptop because, no matter what he tried, sleep wouldn’t come.

He usually felt most alert during practice, his morning runs, or when he got some alone time with Andrew. Those moments of sharp clarity were his favorite times, with the entire world coming into focus. Yet he still felt a little paranoid, worried that he might slip up and somehow lose consciousness at any time. Maybe he should take after Wymack and start drinking coffee all day.

\-----

_This might be a problem_ Neil thought.

He was awake but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t open his eyes but he could feel Andrew kneeling over him. Andrew was patting his cheek and saying his name over and over but Neil couldn’t respond. His heart started racing as he tried, again and again, to open his eyes or move his arm, to do _anything_.

“I’m calling Abby,” Andrew said, his voice tight with worry.

Neil heard other voices – Kevin and Nicky – asking what was wrong with him. Andrew growled at them to back up and then he was talking to Abby, explaining what was going on.

It was awful, like being drugged. He was trapped and couldn’t control his own body. How long would he be stuck like this? What if… what if there was something really wrong with him? Panic gripped him tight and he moaned, a low, dreadful noise that slipped out of his slack mouth.

“I don’t _know_ what’s wrong!” Andrew shouted. “We were kissing and then he just went limp and blacked out and now I can’t get him to wake up!” There was a pause. “I don’t know! Fine.”

There was a snap as Andrew closed his phone and then he was back, sitting by Neil on the edge of the mattress. He took Neil’s unresisting hand and squeezed. Andrew was shaking, small tremors that vibrated through Neil’s hand. It made Neil’s heart seize with pain and he desperately wanted to open his eyes, to move his mouth and tell Andrew he would be okay. But would he? What the hell was happening? 

“Neil.” Andrew’s voice was low and unsteady. “You have to wake up. I can’t – ” Andrew’s voice caught and he stopped talking. He squeezed Neil’s hand and this time, miraculously, Neil was able to squeeze back. It was a small movement but it felt huge.

“Can you hear me?” Andrew asked. “Neil?”

Neil tightened his grip and tried opening his eyes. He blinked slowly and fought to keep his eyes open. Andrew held his hand in both of his, leaning over Neil like he’d been seriously injured. Neil had never seen Andrew look like this – uncertain and scared.

“Fuck.” Andrew’s voice came out like he’d been punched in the gut. “Neil. What – what the – are you okay?” 

Neil nodded. He breathed in, filling his lungs, before slowly exhaling. Systems were coming online so he tried for speech. “Y-yeah. Don’t know… what happened.” He yawned and blinked away the spots that clouded his vision. “ ’m sorry I scared you.”

Andrew scrubbed a hand over his face and shook his head. His jaw was clenched and it looked like he was grinding his teeth. His throat worked as he swallowed. But his tight hold on Neil’s hand gentled and he rubbed his thumb over the inside of Neil’s wrist, over his thrumming, anxious pulse.

“Abby’s on her way,” Andrew said and then he didn’t speak. Neil didn’t dare to say anything either. He couldn’t tell Andrew he was okay or fine or even that he would be. He didn’t know what was going on with him. Suddenly all of his random naps felt more sinister and less like an annoying new habit.

It was a relief when Abby arrived. Andrew moved to sit on the other bed and watched with narrowed eyes as she examined Neil and asked him questions. Abby’s calm and professional manner helped settle Neil. He’d never feel truly comfortable discussing his health but for once he was totally at a loss and having someone who knew what they were doing was deeply reassuring. Neil could withstand being injured or sick but not being able to control when he was awake or asleep? That frightened him, left him feeling achingly vulnerable.

When Abby was done she sat back with a small sigh. “We’ll need to take you to a doctor for some tests but I think you might have narcolepsy.”

Neil blinked. “For real?”

Abby nodded. “You have the symptoms but you’ll need to get tested to make sure it’s not another condition.” She gave him a small smile that was probably meant to be encouraging. “The good news is that there are medications that can help manage your symptoms, keep you from falling asleep like you did earlier. There are also lifestyle changes you can make, like having a regular sleep schedule and taking short, scheduled naps during the day.” She cut her eyes to Andrew and added, “No drinking or smoking, especially before bed. And you’ve already got regular exercise more than covered.”

“You said that’s the good news,” Neil said. “What’s the bad news?”

“The bad news is this isn’t something you can cure. It might last for a certain period of time and go away or it might not. But like I said, there are ways to treat the symptoms and keep you safe. I can help you make a doctor’s appointment but for right now I would recommend not driving anywhere. If it’s alright with you I’ll let David and the rest of the team know so that they can help keep an eye on you, just to make sure you’re safe throughout the day.”

Neil nodded numbly. For just a little while it had felt like his life was back in his control and now his body was betraying him. He had survived his father and the Moriyamas, had fought so hard for so long and now this. He buried his head in his hands.

Abby placed a tentative hand on his shoulder. “I know this is a lot to take in, Neil, but you’ll be okay. This is a condition that you can manage. And we’ll all support you and help you. You might even want to talk to Bee – ”

Neil shook his head. He sat up and rolled his shoulders, gently and intentionally dislodging Abby’s hand. He moved to the other bed and sat down by Andrew, leaning against him. Andrew took the hint and wrapped his arm around Neil’s waist, drawing him in. 

“Just let me know when the appointment is,” Neil told Abby, his voice sounding scratchy and hoarse. “Thank you for coming.” He tipped his face to the side, hiding in the crook of Andrew’s neck. He couldn’t deal with this, with Abby, with anything. 

“Of course.” Abby’s voice was soft. Neil listened as she gathered up her things and left, quietly closing the door behind her.

Once she was gone Andrew hauled Neil onto his lap and held him in a tight hug. Neil’s arms hung limp at his sides and he couldn’t bring himself to hug Andrew back. His throat felt hot and tight, like a giant lump was growing there, and his eyes stung. Before he knew it, he was crying, silent streams of tears running down his face and soaking into Andrew’s shirt. Andrew rubbed his back and ran his fingers through Neil’s hair. He didn’t say anything, just let Neil cry it out. 

“This is ridiculous,” Neil said. “I – I can’t believe I fell asleep while _kissing you_. Who does that?! And then I couldn’t even move!” He bit his lip hard to keep from sobbing or yelling. “ _Fuck_!”

Andrew kissed the side of his face.

“Ugh,” Neil groaned. “It’s just one thing after another. Wait until Kevin finds out.”

“Kevin can’t say shit,” Andrew said sharply. “So far this hasn’t affected your performance during practice and we all know that’s Kevin’s number one priority.”

Neil shuddered. “I hate this, Andrew. At first I thought I was just tired after everything and would bounce back but it’s getting worse.” His hands balled up into tight fists, his nails digging into his palms.

“Shhhh.” Andrew nuzzled against Neil’s hair. “I’ll keep an eye on you. Remember when the team took shifts walking you to and from classes? We’ll do that again. It’ll be fine. We’ll find a new normal.”

Neil let out a deep sigh. He felt melodramatic for being so upset. Before today he’d been kind of managing with his “new normal.” He knew Andrew was right, they’d make it work. But it felt like the rug had been pulled out from under him and he was still falling.

“I don’t like being out of control,” Neil whispered. He raised one hand and clutched at the front of Andrew’s T-shirt.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry I passed out on you.”

Andrew shook his head and tugged at Neil’s hair. “Don’t apologize. It wasn’t your fault.” 

“Still.” Neil knew that Andrew was probably freaked out but was hiding it to make sure that he was okay. He knew it would bother Andrew that during an intimate moment Neil had lost consciousness and therefore lost his ability to consent. “I’m glad you were there, though,” he said softly. “It was scary and awful but at least I knew you had me and I was safe.”

Neil felt Andrew’s heavy exhale, felt some of his tension easing. Andrew pressed his forehead to Neil’s.

“I’ll always have your back,” Andrew promised, voice rough but steady with conviction. “We’ll be fine.”

They sat there for a long time and Neil let it all sink in. His life was changing again. It was always changing, always different. But Andrew was right, they would be fine. 

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on tumblr @dkafterdark


End file.
